"You're Not Like Other Girls"

I thought I'd start my first feminism post with a simple subject, rather than try to tackle the wage gap or lack of representation in the media.

"You're not like other girls."

At one time or another, we've all heard this.  It could be the male lead in a movie trying to sway the female love-interest, or perhaps you've even been told this.  Maybe you've said this to a woman.  What appears as a compliment has hidden (and negative) undertones.

While this may be a genuine compliment and she truly is like no other girl you've ever met before, chances are you have met women like her.  Amongst the dozens of ladies you know and the hundreds you've met, there's bound to be qualities she shares.

But this phrase isn't trying to say she's different than those women. It implies that she's better than those women.

Think about it; It's meant to be a compliment to her.  She's wonderful, fantastic, and you enjoy spending time with her, don't you?  But what does that say about all those women who aren't like her?  Does that make them terrible, dreadful, and unpleasant to spend time with?

This is a classic example of lifting one up by putting others down.  It's manipulative and shames an entire gender for the sake of making one person feel good about herself.  Not much of a compliment, eh?

It stems from a misperception that is rooted in society, one that we see in characters like Penny in the Big Bang Theory and Cher in Clueless.  With every female character we see in movies that lacks substance and originality, it contributes to this idea that women in real life lack substance and originality -- that our interests include shopping and tanning, that we can't form a sentence without the words "like" or "um" every so often, or that we can't possibly be good at -- let alone interested in -- "manly" things like sports and video games.  Any women who shows substance and originality beyond this narrowly defined personality is a special snowflake and should be acknowledged for it (I hope that sentence made you cringe reading it as much as I did writing it).

Surprise, surprise! Hardly any woman fits this stereotype entirely, though we all (men included) have attributes from it.  And for the few who do fit it, that's ok too! What's not alright is allowing this to be the default for girls because it limits them.  Just because a women likes to shop, that doesn't make her materialistic, nor does wearing makeup make her self-absorbed.  Having no interest in sports doesn't make her "unrelateable" to men, and repeating "um" does not mean she's a ditz.

The next time you hear this line, remember - he may have a high opinion of you, but he has a poor judgement of women in general.  If you have the chance to respond to the person, tell him that while his intentions may be good, the compliment would be more meaningful if he compared you to people in general rather than just women.  And if you're comfortable enough with him, call him out on it!  Ask him what makes you different from other girls, and he'll probably list a few sexist stereotypes like the ones from above.  If it's a genuine compliment, then he should be able to use the word "people" in place of "girls," (ex: "you're not like other people because no one else makes me laugh this hard.")

Three More Weeks... and Then, Monterey!

Monterey, California, that is.  Scott and I will be going up there the week after finals.  Nothing is set in stone yet as we still need to find out our schedules at the time, but until then I will excitedly check hotel pricing in the area.  Right now I'm looking into The Monterey Hotel, an old-Victorian style place from the early 20th century and hoping that we can plan to stay on the discounted days.

This trip is a partial anniversary retreat for us -- two years next month -- and a chance for us to spend time together before Scott leaves on his 6-month study abroad program in Switzerland (I've already tried asking to go with him and it just won't work out. Pooh).

We'll spend the day at Fisherman's Warf, the Aquarium of the Pacific, and go to all the best beaches for spotting sea otters.  Oh, these three weeks can't pass soon enough!

Cooking Hack: Chocolate Chip Cookies

If you haven't noticed yet, I have a large sweet tooth.  So far there's about 3 or 4 recipes on the blog and only one is a proper meal.  Tee hee.

Image from verybestbaking.com

Amongst my favorite of all sweets is the classic chocolate chip cookie.  For years I followed various recipes always to find flat cookies that were either too crunchy on the bottom (large stiffness) or too flimsy to stay in one piece (large bending moment).  But for soft cookies, the only solution was to make the cookie taller (which would increase the moment of inertia).  The secret that took me years to discover?

Lard.

Yep, good ol' pig fat. Lovely, isn't it? (Is butter much better though?)

Substitute an equal amount of butter for lard, no matter the recipe. I like to use the Nestle Toll House one printed on the back of the chocolate chip bags.

If you don't eat animal products, shortening made from vegetable fat is also an option.

Conclusion: cookies would make terrible structural elements.

Painted Planting Pots

Now that the warmer weather is setting in, it's perfect time to begin growing garden herbs.  Or, if you're without a garden of your own like me, pots are a great substitute.  Who says they have to be plain terra cotta? Below is a fairly simple tutorial on how I painted my planting pots and choosing environmentally-friendly paint.

Can you guess what I'll be growing in them?

What you'll need:

• terracotta pots and saucers (I used three 6" ones)
• paint (one 2 fl oz bottle of Americana in 'zinc' can cover three 6" pots and saucers)
• paint brushes / small sponges (make-up sponges will work too)
• old newspaper
• pencil
• Sharpie Water-Based Medium-Point Pen

[images coming soon]

What to do:

1.  Make sure pots and saucers are clean. If you just purchased them, they should be ok.  If you're using old pots, place them in a white vinegar-water solution (more info here). 
2. Once clean, apply the first coat of paint. To have a nice, finished layer, paint several thin coats -- outdoors.  Painting will likely take two stages, the top/bottom of the saucer and the inside/outside of the pots.  When painting the inside of the pots, only paint down approx. 1" from the top. Let dry for about 45 minutes to 1 hour on newspapers before applying the next coat.  I used 4 coats in total with small, partial touch-ups. 
3. After finishing the final coat of paint, take the pencil and very very lightly write out your message - plant / herb types, name of a friend (gifts!), etc. It may be helpful to draw a straight line parallel to the bottom of the pot.  
4. Test the sharpie pen on newspaper before using on the pots.  It requires a lot of shaking and a decent amount of pressure for the ink to flow.  Trace over the pencil, stopping every so often to shake again.  

The Potential Impacts of Paint

It's not something often thought of.  It lingers on our walls for years until a fresh coat is painted over top.  But without proper precautions, paint can have negative effects on indoor air quality and breathing conditions.  Steps have been taken to make paint less-dangerous -- at least there's no lead anymore (and that took nearly 75 years to put into effect after the dangers of lead were discovered).  Today the largest danger in paint are VOCs - volatile organic compounds.  As paint dries, these compounds are released and combine with existing gases in the air to form ozone.  This has been linked to breathing problems and headaches, and in extreme cases cancer, as well as liver and kidney damage.

If you're in the market for paints, look for key-words like 'low VOC' or 'VOC free,' and opt for water-based paints over oil-based.  Another good indicator is the Green Seal, given to paints with VOC levels below 50 g/L for flat finishes and 100 gL/ for non-flat finishes.

Image from greenseal.org

As rapid consumers, Americans bring thousands of goods into our homes each year, several of which have not been tested for chemicals.  Unfortunately, companies have limited product safety standards to meet and oftentimes prioritize profit over environmental responsibility and consumer health.  This leaves shoppers unaware of potential dangers in the items they're buying.  But you don't have to be! A few of my favorite trusted sites on product information are listed below:

• Cradle to Cradle - reusable products that eliminate the need for material extraction and future waste by increasing its life-span.
• EWG's Skin Deep Cosmetic Database - look up the dangers of beauty/cosmetic items. Over 61,000 products recorded.
• Household Products Database - perhaps the largest range of items of the sources listed here.
• Safer Products - US Consumer Product Safety Commission (government-sponsored) website were people can report problems with specific goods.

Being a smart shopper means more than saving money.  While the majority of products on shelves have hidden dangers, more and more sustainable goods are emerging as consumers demand higher safety standards. 

What's Caught My Eye Recently Masterpost - 2016 Swimsuits Edition

The weather is warming up and we're just about nearing swimsuit season!  This year is full of fantastic suits, so I thought I'd create a masterpost to share them all!  Below you can find my top ten favorite swimmies for 2016, perfect for the beach or relaxing poolside.

Seafolly Umbrella Maillot Swimsuit

A few years ago I purchased this swimsuit in the striped rope pattern and absolutely adore it. I might be getting another Maillot in the near future.

Fruity Suity One Piece Swimsuit in Citrus

There's just something so summer-y about citrus fruits: lemonade, margharitas... they never taste better than on a hot summer's day. This suit was made for sipping a cool drink poolside. And it comes in plus sizes too? Ahhh!

Rita One Piece Swimsuit by Fables by Barrie

Fables by Barrie is well-known for their vintage-style swimsuits, with styles that range from nautical to western. This suit might be one of their simpler styles, but there is nothing simple about the bow in the back. How cute!

Fjord Your Information Two Piece Swimsuit

I figured I should include atleast one two piece suit for those who don't like one pieces. (But who really dislikes one pieces as cute as these?) I love how playful this suit is, from the spring-time color palette to the sweet-heart neckline.
(This can be purchased as a set from ModCloth or two separate pieces (top and bottom) from Unique Vintage.)

Swim Solutions Contrast-Trim One Piece Swimsuit

This is another brand I'm familiar with. Last year I bought a swim-dress from Swim Solutions and it (somehow) survived 8 crazy weeks in Europe - including the many lakes of Lithuania - without getting left behind. Still in fantastic condition today.

Helen Jon White Sands Del Rey One Piece Swimsuit

There's something so fabulously retro with a belted swimsuit. The orange band around the waist really emphasizes curves, just like styles from the 1950s.

Esther Williams Two Piece Yellow Delicious Swimsuit

This is a new print from a classic brand, Esther Williams. If you don't have one of her swimsuits yet - what are you waiting for?
(Top and bottom purchased separately.)

Lauren Ralph Lauren Halter Swimdress

This one is a lot like the Swim Solutions suit above, but includes side rutching and a skirted bottom. Can you tell how much I like the white top border? (aahh, clean lines.) It also comes in seven different colors.

Panache Britt Two Piece Swimsuit

One more two piece to close the post. Panache has a fantastic reputation for their bras - and their swim is just the same. The sizing runs by bra sizes, so you can match your fit down to a 't'. There's also a beautiful cobalt with red bows color that's just as cute as this one!
(Top and bottom purchased separately.)

Cleaning White Canvas Shoes With Common Household Ingredients

A nice pair of white shoes can be very versatile.  They're as classic as black flats but match with the lovely pastel dresses of spring and summer.  But some might shy away from them because they become dirty so easily.  Doesn't it seem like your feet are stepped on more frequently when wearing white sneakers?  There's a whole branch of science dedicated to this idea that things naturally become less perfect (or more chaotic) over time -- known as entropy.  In short: it's supposed to happen by the laws of physics.  But while science may soil them, we can also use science to clean them, as well as 5 common household ingredients.  

[before and after pictures to come once they dry]

What you'll need:

1. Soilove (ok, so this may not be as common as baking soda, but this is the best stain-remover I've used and should be a common ingredient in all homes. Click here for safety information)
2. cotton ball, rag or spray bottle
3. 3/4 cup baking soda
4. 1/4 cup water
5. scrub brush or old toothbrush - don't plan to use it for your teeth after this

What to do:

1. Remove initial stains by rubbing Soilove onto a small cotton ball or rag.  If you have a spray bottle, you can also cover spots with a light spray.  Wash hands immediately after using Soilove - it can irritate skin after a while.  If you are using the spray bottle, you won't be able to use it again for cooking, baking, watering plants, or similar activities.
2. Leave shoes to soak in Soilove for approx. 15-30 minutes. If stains don't appear to fade after 10 minutes, apply another coat. 
3. Rinse shoes completely with cold water directly under a faucet, rubbing on stains with hands. If any spots are still noticeable, apply another coat of Soilove and wait 10 min. 
4. Rinse shoes again, this time with hot water.  Stains will be removed by either hot or cold water, depending on the stain.  Chances are there's more than one type on your shoes, so do both to remove both.  Some stains (like blood) will set with hot water so be sure to rinse cold first. 
5. Combine baking soda and water in a bowl.
6. With brush, scrub the mixture all over the shoes.  This will help brighten shoes and keep white from turning to cream. Let shoes sit for about 5-10 min. 
7. Rinse shoes with warm water, and leave to dry.  They will likely take at least 24 hours to dry, so don't clean them if you plan to wear them the next day.

The science behind it:

Baking soda is also known as sodium bicarbonate. When added to water, it ionizes into a solution with hydroxide ions - making it basic.  Most common household cleaners, like body soap or floor cleaner, are basic solutions with a pH level between 11-14 - known to be the target range for removing oil and grease.

So whether you cook with grease and oil often, roll around in the grass with your pets, or simply have the laws of physics working against you, you need no longer fear to wear white shoes. 

A Collection of 1960s Music

I sure do like the clothes of the 1960s, but the music from that era deserves recognition as well. By far, my most-played playlist is one of hits throughout the decade, appropriately titled Love / Happy Songs of the 60s. A few days ago the playlist hit 100 followers on Spotify, and I thought that I ought to share it on here.

If you like artists such as The Beach Boys, The Mamas and the Papas, The Beatles, Sam Cooke, The Four Tops, The Supremes, and many others, please give it a listen!